Let me start by saying I love my job. I’ve said before that my colleagues have been like family to me, I love that I get to do meaningful work that helps real people and I’m pretty sure the only thing that kept my extroverted self sane during the COVID-19 pandemic was coming into the office every day. I have said from the day I signed on that I believe God brought me to this place.

But every Sunday, while I’m lying in bed thinking about the week to come, I’m plunged into this deep pool of grief at the thought of spending another week away from my kids. They’re only little for a short while and I’m missing it, seeing the hours I actually get with them slip through the cracks of my fingers I am desperately trying to hold tight.

The tension of holding Gratitude and Grief together isn’t discussed often, but it’s common to us all. I am so so grateful I have this job, yet I’m grieved it is necessary when my heart longs for time with my kids. I imagine you can think of something you are both thankful to have yet grieved over. Even Jesus in Grief asked for the cup of sacrifice to be passed from him, but Paul said it was for the Joy set before him that he endured the cross. The tension of holding Gratitude and Grief together feels so uncomfortable that we often either stuff our Grief, refusing to acknowledge it and never receive the comfort we need to prevent us from periodically spiraling into sorrow or we don’t connect with and express Gratitude because we believe if we were truly grateful, we wouldn’t experience grief.

God wants to meet you in this tension today. He wants to bless and flourish that which is meant to move you into abundant life while also comfort and heal the places that are wounded by the imperfect nature of this life.