Dawn

Every single day for the last 9 months, I have gotten out of bed and checked to see if we’ve received something from my husband’s school. We were supposed to get it back in September, and he’s had multiple meetings where people have assured him things just got tied up in paperwork, but it is coming.

If you look at kids, you’ll see waiting in general for anything is hard. But waiting long periods of time seems like torture, especially if you’re waiting for something truly life changing.

My preschooler reminds me often we need to be patient, but I’m always wondering where the line is between patient and getting lost in what Dr. Seuss called “the waiting place,” where people waste their entire lives just waiting for something to happen. The temptation to harass, to manipulate, to force into existence what we have been waiting so long for is great, but I think it’s only that way because hope deferred makes the heart sick, and a sick heart believes that waiting means stopping, and stopping means dying, so it fights instead.

In these moments, I turn my face to the east and remember the dawn. I remember a time I only looked to the dawn to experience beauty, until I realized it’s primary purpose wasn’t to be beautiful, but faithful. The Prophets used the dawn as an analogy for the faithfulness of God, because no matter how dark the night became, the sun would rise the following morning and no matter how long the waiting seemed, God would show up for his people. When I consider the Dawn and the warmth and light it brings, I am encouraged that that which my family needs in order to grow is with absolute certainty on its way.

So every morning I wake up with hope in my heart that today is the day, and when it hasn’t been, I firmly declare maybe tomorrow. If you are also patently waiting for Dawn, I can assure you, it is coming.

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